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Do pakistani men cheat

Do Pakistani Men Cheat
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in. Did my strong opinionated headline draw you in? Or not all Pakistani men.

Name: Anna-Diane

My age: 32
Available to: Generous guy
Eyes colour: Huge brown
What is my body features: My body type is athletic
I like: Singing
My tattoo: I don't have tattoos

This is not an ode to a Pakistani male. Nor an elegy. Nor even an apology. It is a statement of fact hopefully. A fact called the Pakistani male The Pakistani male is the perfect gentleman The Pakistani male is the laziest thing going In short, needs to grow up.

Here, six women, from a sociologist to a sweepress, speak against at the risk of being called 'frustrated old [women]' and for at the risk of being called doormats — the Pakistani male.

This desire to possess a pure, untouched woman — it smacks of ugly conservatism," says Sheema Kermani, an artist by hobby. They want a pretty dumb female who has not had any access to the open world, to ideas, to books — in short, someone who cannot raise issues and stir controversies. The Pakistani male is insecure; he feels he just cannot cater to a woman who is going to be able to respond as well as a person of his own standing.

I disagree with this concept of a male being the sole bread-earner. Very often the woman is bringing in as much income as the man, yet the Pakistani male continues to lord it over her. Why should a man feel hurt if I ask him to make a cup of tea for me and my friends? After all, I would do the same for his friends. If you're being simple, honest and frank, you're hurting their egos.

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God, why make so much of a man's ego? Women have their egos too. They have as much pride. Besides, if you have the inner confidence and inner strength, you don't suffer from ego problems. As personalities, I find our males very weak people. Very characterless. If the mother wants to make them into something, they'll become that. If the wife wants to make them into something else, they'll get made into that.

Hope changes to despair

There's no strength of character. They generally get pushed into situations.

Yes, the Pakistani male feels strongly responsible for his family — at least economically, unlike in the West, where they can walk out without qualms. But a devoted man need not necessarily be a loyal husband. Lots of men have relationships outside of marriage. Very often the woman can't do anything about it, since she doesn't want to be a divorced woman. On the other hand, if the wife cheats on the man, there is physical violence and the threat of divorce. The macho myth is destructive.

Between themselves, they are good friends, but with women, they can't get away from their own personal hang-ups of male-female relationships. It's a superficial kind of relationship. Besides, I find most of our men have this tendency to discuss their relationships with women, even if the woman be their wife, with others. Actually, their main topic of conversation is women — where they met her, what she was wearing, how she looked etc, etc.

Are they socially and politically as aware — as they are of women? But it is restricted to reading newspapers. Oh, males abroad are just as bad, just as exploitative.

But women in Europe and America have carried out movements to change their views. But Pakistani men don't feel the need to change, since there's been no such movement here.

Confession #1:

Even those who've been exposed to such ideas couldn't care less. But surely there must be something to recommend the Pakistani male — they still open doors, offer seats, pull up chairs for women? I couldn't care less if men are opening doors and pulling chairs, when they are depriving me of everything else. I want to be treated as a human being, accepted as an individual. The more unfaithful he is to his wife, the more possessive he is about her. This from Fehmida Riaz, little known as the editor of a monthly magazine, Awazand best remembered as the "shocking poetess" of Badan Dareeda.

I wouldn't have minded the male reaction had the females reacted differently But even the reaction of the female was that of a male-dominated society, where women have not spoken up before. Do you mean to say Pakistani males still regard women as chattel?

Consciously, perhaps, they do not regard women as chattels. It is more subtle. The man-woman relationship in our society still suffers from feudal and tribal mores. A woman has been a sort of sexual satisfaction to the male and she fulfills some very basic needs in a very unimaginative, very repetitive way.

And females from our country will vouch for their hypocrisy and their dual standards? Which means, men aren't really to be blamed if they go around with one woman and marry another. Love in our society does not have that social sanction. It is still regarded as one of those little adventures before you marry to equal or better your situation. I am not offering any excuses for the Pakistani male. But the situation in our society is not due to the insensitivity of males — but our whole social structure. You cannot tear away the male characteristics from what our society is.

And this characteristic of Pakistani male to stare at any female on the street — can you tear him away from that? The man in the street normally does not come from the same class as a well-dressed woman. He has this class animosity. He hardly uses the same language and gestures when talking to a woman of the same class. I remember, once I was going in a rickshaw and had to get off at a certain place in Lyari because I didn't know the way. I was mortally afraid of being attacked by the males who stared and jeered at me. And while I stood there trying to grope my way out of the situation, two women dressed in tatters passed by.

They didn't even look at them. Oh yes, oh yes. They thrive on gossip. They are in touch with the latest scandals. We women hardly have the time for that. You have the most inificant conversation with a man and it can be the subject of a very fantastic and animated discussion for months on end in their circle. That way, they are much more boisterous than their counterparts in the western world. Not as well-read as their counterparts in the West, but that's because there are multiple censors — moral censors, political censors.

There is little of consequence to read. They are not good conversationalists generally — but maybe they are somewhat more sensitive, more sincere and a little Do pakistani men cheat as compared to their Western counterparts. Besides, an average Pakistani is more socially and politically aware than an Indian or Englishman. That's because of the peculiar circumstances they've passed through.

They've thrown away two military dictators and have proved their mettle time and again. In any case, their sense of humour is much more than that of the average Pakistani female.

This comment to prick those "fragile egos" comes from a female quarter — Farida Shaheed, a sociologist with a Masters degree from Leeds, specialising in rural development problems and development. Farida Shaheed. On the other hand, they don't seem to pay very much attention to her ego other than in a very superficial manner. To them, her ego is limited to her beauty and her capacity to entertain, whereas a man's ego entails his work level, his intelligence, his athletic prowess etc, etc, etc.

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